| (no subject) |
[Sep. 20th, 2008|10:08 pm] |
What'd i gotta do t make you love me? What i gotta do t make you stay?
Nessa, cheer up. I love you.
I'm devastated. Help me. |
|
|
| i'd lie |
[Sep. 16th, 2008|01:08 pm] |
yesterday was hell. I got whacked again. my skin tore. damn shit.
my smiley closed cause my damn mother made me take it out. She took my phone away and read all my messages and found out about what _____ does and found out about me ______g today. i hate life. urghhhhhh.
skipped school today casue my mother didnt allow me t go.
I find it hard to care. I wanted t see something that's different. something you say would change in me. Wanted t be everything different. I wanna change something inside of me. Its so hard. |
|
|
| one last shot |
[Sep. 14th, 2008|11:07 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  sad | ] |
'I'm gonna get you. I'm gonna prove my love for you'
Life keeps gettting in th way of my happiness. I can't help but t do all th mistakes i've ever made over and over again. I need t help myself t change. Prolly that'll never happen. i have no self-control. I hate th way i treat my friends. I hate th way i push my family aside. I hate th way i live my life, with no control and limits. help me.
I'm gonna shine for you. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Sep. 12th, 2008|09:35 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | crushed | ] |
If only i could have a 'press this button t restart your life' kindda thing.
I dread everything stupid i've done in my life. urghhhhhhh mistakes.......uneraseable....hard t forgive.....maybe if i just....maybe if i didnt...Would it have made a difference?. I wanna wither away. I wanna feel th pain that i've caused people t feel.
anyways, i pierced my smiley again. Ok thats all.
bye.
I. Bleed. Just. To. Know. I'm. Alive. |
|
|
| Daddy's little girl |
[Sep. 12th, 2008|09:17 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | depressed | ] |
daddy.
I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. I would take back all that i've ever done t hurt you if i could. Please dont remain angry at me. I love you so much, i would die if you died. You have t remain strong. You musnt give up. please. i'm really sorry for everything. I know you may think i dont love you at all, but th truth is i love you so much:( I couldbt bear t lose you. You're my life. Im your little girl. I will never stop blaming myself for all your pains or whatever it is you;re having. urghhhhhh i dont know whats wrong with me. I'm so stupid. i have no self control. i hope you're alright. i'll come visit you tomorrow. i miss you already. I miss your stupid jokes and you're stupid funny faces that always made me smile. i love you with all my heart and nothing/no one will ever come between that love i have for you.
With love,
lisa. |
|
|
| i gave you my world |
[Sep. 8th, 2008|06:00 pm] |
But you showed me th door.
School was alright. Kindda slacky today though. i need t _______. i have nothing else intelligent t say. so i'm gonna go. peace.
you dont know what you've got till its gone. |
|
|
| to be, or not t be? |
[Sep. 7th, 2008|08:27 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  confused | ] |
I'm already damaged at best,like you've already figured out. I'm falling apart, I'm barely breathing with a broken heart that's still beating. In a pain there is healing, in your name i find meaning. I'm barely holding on t you.Th broken locks were a warning you got inside my head. I tried my best t be guarded, i am and open book instead. I still see your reflection inside of my eyes that are looking for a purpose, they're still looking for life. I'm hanging on another day just t see what you will throw my way And i'm hanging onto th words you say, you said that i will be ok.
I'm speechless. I've nothing more t say t you.
I'm a fool for your love. |
|
|
| In a world of deceit |
[Sep. 6th, 2008|01:18 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | sad | ] |
what does love mean?
Im bored. yes very bored. I kindda pissed my father off by putting my dirty shoes on th washing machine. how very smart of me. Sometimes i really hate myself. I do th silliest of things. urghhhhhhhh. i hate menses. i hate it so much. i want it t go away so badly. it's smelly and dirty and disgusting. ok bye.
There's nothing left for us anymore. Now here's th door. |
|
|
| you make me feel so alive |
[Sep. 5th, 2008|07:09 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | crushed | ] |
Its time i learned to fall, to say the word goodbye. :( |
|
|
| all we are |
[Sep. 5th, 2008|04:22 pm] |
Lips of an angel.
being grounded really does suck. Joseph, you're so stupid. and my body is nicer than yours. HAHAHAHAHHAHA. Bordemn pretty much does that t you. siobhan and my new club is called....TH ANTI LOVE CLUB FOR ME AND MY NIGGA HIGGAS:)
I used t call you mine, but not anymore. |
|
|
| learning to fall |
[Sep. 4th, 2008|03:35 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  frustrated | ] |
siobhan best, i miss you. please text me soon. love you.
Maybe it's time i learned t fall, to say th word goodbye to feel th sunlight on my face, maybe that means im ready t fly, i wanna breathe in and breathe out and be who i am, let go of fear wanna feel alive. Th more you hold me back you set me free, you help my heart decide maybe im ready t fly.
I'm so bored. i might die of bordemn soon. someone save me please. I need t..... so badly. omg. gone 3 days without it and yet i feel so miserable. what am i t do?
I feel so gone. I feel like my souls had enough of me and decided t leave my body. Weird much? Maybe its a sign.
I'm. Bleeding. Save. Me?.
It’s time to break these chains,
To look you in the eye,
To tell you that its over now |
|
|
| at th losing end |
[Sep. 3rd, 2008|04:03 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | jealous | ] |
i feel like my whole life's been taken away from me. I feel a sense of angst and jealousy coming from me again. Speaking th truth sometimes comes along with a price t pay.
You may think im okay. But let me tell you, im not. nowhere near okay. Infact i think im dying.
Well spend an hour but no more than two
Our only chance to speak once more
I showed you the answers, now heres the door |
|
|
| Love? |
[Sep. 2nd, 2008|04:16 pm] |
came back from camp yesterday. camp was ruined. Yesterday i told my parents what i dread t tell them for 1 year and surprisingly they took it rather well. ____ text me today. i feel like im falling for her over again. what am i t do.
So far away for where you are, those miles have torn us worlds apart and i miss you. Standing under th stars and i wished you were here. I miss th months that were erased, i miss th way th sunshine would light up your face, i miss all th little things i never thought meant everything t me. I feel th beating of your heart, i see th shadows of your face. Just know wherever you are, i miss you and wished you were here.
Loving you was a mistake.Im going t make that same mistake again. |
|
|
| im nothing t you |
[Aug. 27th, 2008|08:47 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | depressed | ] |
I was'nt perfect, i did alot of stupid things, still no angel. I wasnt looking for forgiveness, wasnt laid out by my pride. You're kind of everything im not. You're not perfect, you're not an angel, You're not patient, You're not my conscience, You're nothign i thought you were. You dont know me. I dont know you. So basically everything you said t me was a lie. thanks, you really know how t treat a girl. grow up.
And t you:
I really dont know what t say t you anymore. i mean, you're so............ ahh whatever. go figure.
so basically school sucked. i've had enough of this shit from friends,girls...so on and so forth. No one seems t care. No one. I bet if th day should come when i die,no one will notice, everyone will laugh/smile/enjoy th peace and joy with me gone. I hope i die soon. i hate this feeling of not being notice or loved. No one really cares about me right? I dont belong here.No one deserves t have a stupid fucked up bitch friend like me. Everyone deserves much more.
What should i do? You all decide,please. Slip away or remain? |
|
|
| she left me |
[Aug. 26th, 2008|09:14 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | crushed | ] |
First things first. you meant th world t me. You made me feel like i belonged in this stupid world. Why do you have t step on me like im some kind of unwanted peice of paper? What th fuck did i ever do t you, t deserve this? Tell me. i really want t know where i went wrong. was it me? was it you? I dont fucking like feeling like this. If your intention was t hurt me, well i must say 'bravo'.
Im really a loser t fall for you. Just t let you know, im not gonna let this slide. You've hurt me. So fucking bad. And i fucking hate you for that.
I.WANT.T.DIE.PLEASE.AND.THANK.YOU |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Aug. 24th, 2008|06:25 pm] |
|
I SWEAR GERALDINE LIM ROCKS MY SOCKS. |
|
|
| write me a love song |
[Aug. 21st, 2008|05:55 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  crazy | ] |
school was alright. get well soon apple<3. After school with th girls. love love love love them so much.
With every kiss and every hug, you make me fall in love. |
|
|
| Far apart |
[Aug. 21st, 2008|01:27 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | uncomfortable | ] |
yesterday was hell good. After detention headed t gradens with siobs then maria and fy joined us. laughed like shit till i stepped on wet cement and laughed even more. HAHHAHAHAH. i almost died of embarrassment. wheeeeeeeeeeeeee, i love my friends.
OMG im fucking freezing, th air con is fucking cold. i cant type proparly. im gonna turn into ice very soon.
With arms wide open. |
|
|
| untouchable |
[Aug. 19th, 2008|06:40 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  cold | ] |
Morning was hell good. I love you best:)(P.S. my knee still fucking hurts. HAHAHHA) After school headed t yishun with kimmo t meet ______. she left. i headed t causeway t meet gian,jesh, bradley,trevor and becca:)
Th walls between you and i, always keeping us apart.
cip pics
    |
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
kissmylifeaway's journal